Not Quite Right
by Danica Enjolras
Summary: It's time for Enjolras to learn what it's like to be a girl... Consider this one abandoned, folks! If you want to read a short, unfinished badfic, have at it.
1. The madness begins!

Title: Not Quite Right Chapter: 1/? Rating: PG-13  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except for Alexandrie Madeline and Madame Cretsvich. So this means I don't own any incarnation of Enjolras. *sad sigh*  
  
A/N: Okay, hear me out. Enjolras is my favorite character in Les Mis, but I'm known to torture my favorite characters in new and unusual ways.  
  
*****  
  
Madame Cretsvich was a very lonely old woman. She had never fallen in love, and seemed incapable of loving anyone or anything except for herself.and her cats. She lived in Paris and, well, she happened to be a witch. One fairly sunny afternoon, Madame Cretsvich was outside feeding her cats when she saw him. A group of people had gathered around him and was listening to yet another one of his speeches about rising up against the government. To Madame Cretsvich, he was nothing more than a ruckus.  
  
Meanwhile, a young woman in the crowd watched Enjolras. 15 year old Alexandrie Madeline (or Alix for short) brushed a lock of blonde hair out of her green eyes so she could see him. She had dreamt of France being free. Of being able to have some of the better things in life. She wasn't exactly a gamine, but she wasn't a bourgeois either. After the speech, she saw the crowd leaving and eventually walked up to Enjolras. She looked at him and smiled.  
  
"Monsieur, I'd like to help! I want to make France a republic! I want freedom!" Alix said as if she had been practicing for weeks.  
  
Enjolras turned around and looked at her standing in front of him with a look of confidence and rebellion in her eyes.  
  
"Madamoiselle, revolution isn't for little girls," Enjolras said, trying to dismiss the girl.  
  
"Well, then it's a good thing I'm not a little girl, isn't it?" She said not taking a hint.  
  
"Revolution isn't for women, so why don't you go home and do whatever it is that women do?" Enjolras said as he turned around and headed towards the Café Musain, leaving the girl close to tears. This gave Madame Cretsvich, who happened to be watching, an idea to get rid of Enjolras. She walked over to Alix to 'comfort' the girl.  
  
"Did that boy just break your young heart dearie?" Madame Cretsvich asked in a soothing tone.  
  
"In a way. I just want to help! I just want to be free!" Alix replied, holding back tears. "I wish he knew how it felt to be a girl! I wish he knew how it felt to be thought of as the weaker sex!"  
  
"Well dearie, I know this may not help much, but I want to give you something." Madame Cretsvich said. "I'll be right back, I need to get it from my house." She saw Alix nod and went into the house. She came out with a necklace. It was a simple necklace, but it was gorgeous to Alix. It was on a silver chain and there was a red stone with golden lines running through it.  
  
"Thank you.ummm, what's your name?"  
  
"Alavda Cretsvich. What is your name dearie?"  
  
"Alexandrie Madeline, but I prefer to be called Alix.Madame Cretsvich, what is this? I've never seen a necklace like it."  
  
"This dearie, is a wishing necklace."  
  
"A wishing necklace?"  
  
"It's fairly simple, you put it on, and you make a wish. Then your wish'll come true."  
  
Alix put the necklace on and held the stone in her hand. She closed her eyes tightly trying to figure out what to wish.  
  
"I don't know what to wish for!"  
  
"How about what you were wishing for earlier?"  
  
"Okay. I wish Enjolras know what it's like to be a girl."  
  
Madame Cretsvich smiled at her. She walked over to the girl and put her hand on her back.  
  
"Well dearie, you better head on home." The old witch told her. Alix nodded and stared walking towards her apartment.  
  
*****  
  
In the back room at the Café Musain, the three members of Les Amis de l'ABC were getting ready for the meeting. Well, they would have been if any of the others were there. Joly and Bousset were discussing their woes. Joly was talking about his latest fatal diseses, and Bousset was telling him about his real woes. Grantaire was sitting in his corner, listening to them, drunk as can be without being dead or comatose. They all heard the door open and saw a girl with blonde hair and saphire blue eyes wearing men's clothes with an angry look on her face.  
  
"Bonjour mam'zelle-" Grantaire said before the girl glared at him in an all too familiar manner.  
  
"Silence winecask," the girl said in a tone that the three friends had heard being used by Enjolras, who looked like he could have been the girl's brother. Joly and Bousset stared at the girl and Grantaire had fallen asleep when Joly realized that the girl was wearing Enjolras' vest.  
  
"Enjolras?" Joly asked with surprise.  
  
*****  
  
MWAHAHAHA! I'm working on the next chapter! So hopefully it'll be up with in the week.  
  
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	2. In which Courfeyrac and Combeferre becom...

Not Quite Right  
  
Awww! I feel so loved! Before I start up chapter two, I'd like to answer the reviews. Wow, that's new, reviews! Yay!  
  
Sweet775: Awww! You reviewed this twice! *glomps*  
  
Andi: Of course Enjy didn't fall in love with Alix! And I'm not Russian, Serbian, or Croatian, I know I'm part Czech, but that didn't influence Madame Cretsvich.  
  
S n o g g i n g withdrawal: I'm updating! See! Yay!  
  
Vest-Button: Oooo! It's funny? I accomplished being funny! YES!!!!!!! W00t! Party! *^-^*  
  
Mlle. Verity le Virago: You'll see Alix's reason for wanting to be part of the revolution. That's gonna be later on though.  
  
Winter-Lady: Yuppers!  
  
Nicole: Thank you!  
  
La Pamplemousse: It's continuing, but is a little short. I hope it's just as funny.  
  
Linzy: *starts to dust off* You can read chapter two now, you've been sitting there waiting for a while!  
  
Okay, now here's my little apology, I've been busy lately so I didn't find a lot of time to work on chapter two, but I wanted to get it on before I got back to school, which is tomorrow, so enjoy the short chapter two!  
  
Note: GAH! I noticed a mistake in this chapter, so I'm fixing it and reposting it! *****  
  
The girl looked at Joly and gave him an Enjolras-esque look as the only answer. It was all Joly needed to be sure.  
  
"What happened?" Bousset asked.  
  
"How should I know?" Enjolras said, her voice sounding a few octaves higher and all around more feminine.  
  
"Oh no! What if it's a new disease that's going around? Does my tongue look funny to you?" Joly panicked and pulled out a mirror and stuck his tongue out, looking for spots or discoloration.  
  
While Joly looked in the mirror, Courfeyrac walked into the room and saw Enjolras and started walking towards, him, er her, er.oh you know what I mean!  
"Courfeyrac, don't even think about trying to hit on me!" Enjolras said, trying to keep calm.  
  
"How do you know my name?"  
  
"Your name is Chaney Courfeyrac, you're a student, you were raised bourgeois and you hate to admit it, and you're grisette crazed," Enjolras stated, surprising Courfeyrac even more.  
  
"Is she related to Enjolras?" Courfeyrac asked. "Maybe his sister or cousin? Or his really young aunt?"  
  
"Something like that," Joly said once he was convinced he hadn't fallen ill with whatever could make a man a woman and had finished his inspection of his tongue.  
  
"Courfeyrac! I am Enjolras!"  
  
"Maybe AN Enjolras, but you can't be-" Courfeyrac started his sentence, but got interrupted.  
  
"I am Marcellus Enjolras! I don't know what happened to me, but I got turned into a woman!" Enjolras yelled, not noticing Combeferre coming into the room.  
  
"Who is she?" Combeferre asked. "And why does she think she's Enjolras?"  
  
"Combeferre, I don't think I am, I KNOW I am! I am Marcellus Enjolras!" The girl shouted.  
  
"If you're telling the truth, than you aren't Marcellus anymore," Courfeyrac said with a grin.  
  
"WHO ASKED YOU!?!?" Enjolras yelled.  
  
*****  
  
My ego's been fed, but look at those poor muses. They look so.  
  
*sees her muses partying* Never mind. But see this button?  
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	3. In which Enjolras makes a slight decisio...

Not Quite Right  
  
I'm writing Chapter 3! Woo! Fun! Good times! I wanna answer my reviews before I go into the next chapter (which is currently just getting processed in my mind) so here we go!  
  
La Pamplemousse: Courfeyrac should hit on Enjy! And he is special! *gives Courfeyrac milk and cookies*  
  
Toff: O.O Are you serious?!? How convinced?  
  
S n o g g i n g withdrawal: Maybe, I need to figure out what his girl name would be.  
  
Sweet775: You thought Courfeyrac was checking out Enjolras in the last chapter, it gets worse!  
  
Eponine Enjolras: My real name's Danica. I blame it on my parents. And you added me to your list! Thank you! *Grovels*  
  
Vest-Button: Maybe.  
  
Elyse3: Maybe he won't be as sexist now.maybe.  
  
Miru-chan: He just got turned into a girl, he wasn't always one!  
  
Mme. Javert: :-D It's wonderful? Yay! I'll try to get the Cat Fic up ASAP.  
  
Well, I'm gonna get this next chapter started! Yay!  
  
*****  
  
By the time the sun had set, none of the Les Amis de l'ABC had arrived. Enjolras was trying to figure out a way to change back into a man, and still couldn't think of anything. What Enjolras didn't notice was Courfeyrac looking at her (A/N: I'm just gonna call Enjolras a girl for now.) in a manner that he would look at some grisette that would pass him by on the street. Enjolras stood up and sighed.  
  
"I still couldn't think of anything!"  
  
"Maybe if you go to sleep, you'll wake up and be a man again," Joly said before he sneezed. "But I have a cold, so I'm going to head home before it kills me!" Joly said before grabbing his hat and running out the door.  
  
"I should head home too," Bousset said. "If Joly locks the door and falls asleep, I won't be able to get in." Bousset put on his hat and jacket with a hole in it that his house key had fallen out of earlier that day, and walked out the door leaving Enjolras, Courfeyrac, Combeferre, and a still sleeping Grantaire in the café.  
  
"Enjolras, good luck on changing back," Combeferre said while heading towards the door.  
  
"Good luck? Where are you going?" Enjolras said in a shocked tone.  
  
"I have to go home. I can't be late to class tomorrow, you know that." Combeferre said. "The best of luck to you Enjolras."  
  
Courfeyrac and Enjolras watched Combeferre leave. Enjolras sat down and put her head in her hands.  
  
"This isn't my day."  
  
"Don't worry about it ma cherie." Courfeyrac said, sitting down next to Enjolras and putting his arm around her shoulders.  
  
"Courfeyrac, don't touch me!" Enjolras said, moving away from him.  
  
"Sorry. So, do you want to come home with me?" Courfeyrac said.  
  
"WHAT?!" Shrieked Enjolras.  
  
"I don't mean in that way-"  
  
"In what way do you mean then?"  
  
"I mean, do you want to stay at my place tonight, because I don't know what your landlord's reaction would be if he saw a girl going up to your apartment. My landlady on the other hand, is used to seeing me bring home different girls, so she wouldn't think anything's wrong," Courfeyrac said, noticing Enjolras frustrated look.  
  
"I guess you're right. But promise me you won't try anything." Enjolras said, sighing.  
  
"I promise. I, Chaney Courfeyrac, swear I will not try anything. Does that make you feel safer?"  
  
"Oui." Enjolras said as she looked at Grantaire. She walked over to him and tapped him on the shoulder. "Grantaire, wake up." She tapped him again. "Come on winecask, wake up!" Still no answer. With a frustrated groan, Enjolras walked out the door, with Courfeyrac following her.  
  
**********  
  
I feel so loved! I have 20 reviews for this! w00t!  
  
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